A new entry for your golf glossary: ‘Pistosterone’

YOU AREN’T LIKELY to hear the term pistosterone during the Masters telecast this weekend. For one thing, it’s not yet a widely known entry in the universal golf glossary. And two, it is best applied to women, not men.

The word results from the combination of the term “pissed off” with the word “testosterone,” the male hormone. So the definition of pistosterone is the little bit of extra power that emerges in a woman’s golf swing when she is mad.

Pistosterone represents the best possible result of a four-putt on the previous green, loss of a hole in match play or even displeasure with a companion. Instead of breaking your putter, feeling like a loser or snapping at your playing partner, you simply smack your next tee shot with pistosterone.

I first learned the term from one of my club’s top players, whose golf attitude is never-say-die. She’s not one to let a bad shot, bad hole or bad round beat her down; instead, she uses those to fire herself up for the next time.

If you’re not sure how to put pistosterone to work in your game, just try picturing the face of your mean boss or your cheating ex-husband on the golf ball as you tee off, and see if that ball doesn’t get an extra roll or two down the fairway.